Postcards from Thailand

I just received about 15 postcards from my old grade three class. You can imagine how happy this made me. I don't have much to say other than I hope you like them. I do.

"Before we set our hearts too much upon anything, let us examine how happy those are who already posses it."

When to give up on your major

I don't know the answer to this question. I'm also not sure that  'give up' is the right term but with each year that passes, I find it less and less likely that I will find a job in the field I went to university for.

I studied Sport Management at Brock University, near Niagara Falls, Canada. Kind of like learning about business but everything to do with sport. Research in sport, sport globalization, sport law, sport marketing, sales, event management, entrepreneurship, etc...I liked it. I enjoyed going to class, I liked the people and I liked the small school and class size. I decided on Brock because I didn't know what I wanted to study, it was far from my home town, had easier winters and heard it wasn't the hardest department to study in. I met some of my best friends there and don't regret it at all. The only thing I might regret is not going to Teachers College right after University and spending the next two years in jobs that you wouldn't want to write blog posts about. Hindsight is 20/20 and maybe I needed to go through that and meet the people I met to be where I am today and where I am headed after New Zealand. (future post!)

I probably should have figured it out sooner that I wouldn't get a job in my field. Right after I graduated, the 2010 winter Olympics were hiring and other SPMA people were applying and getting jobs for it. I didn't have the money to go to BC and the whole thing didn't sound like it would be that fun. I'm sure I was wrong and was apparently an amazing experience and a great way to meet new contacts. In the back of my head I always kind of thought I would do something with my degree. I love sports and thought about something in the event management side would be interesting. I mean, I spent four years studying it, I should probably get a job in it. I feel like I should have some sort of career path by now (27!). Have been thinking if I meet the right person, I'd like to get married and have cute little babies. As I've discovered, apparently women and children cost a certain degree of money that I do not currently have. When I first moved to Ottawa after graduating from school, my cousin Debbie offered for me to stay at her place. I said I would stay for three months, I moved out just before three years. When I first got there, I told her I needed three things:

1-Cell phone

2-Job

3-Girlfriend.

I got the first two fairly quickly, the girlfriend part eluded me for some time. Shocking eh? I feel like now if I were to have that same talk with her, my priorities would be:

1-Career

2-Wife

3-Babies (They are going to be so cute!!)

And right now, I feel like that is a career not involving what I originally intended. Lots of people study subjects they don't go on to make into career paths, right? And who knows what will happen in a few years from now. That doesn't mean that you can't still read about it or volunteer for causes you feel passionate about. It isn't a zero sum game.
I'd eventually like to own/run my own business or company and for the immediate future, teaching English makes me happy and enables me to travel. If you like, let me know if you ended up studying what you became or how you decided not to pursue your major or any other thoughts you might have on the subject. In the end, having a degree certainly opens up some doors but realistically it is who you meet that will open up the best doors.

A career path is rarely a path at all. A more interesting life is usually a more crooked, winding path of missteps, luck and vigorous work. It is almost always a clumsy balance between the things you try to make happen and the things that happen to you.

Tom Freston

A New Zealand norm

I haven't done a ton on NZ focused posts because I haven't traveled as much as I had planned. If you feel like you don't have a better grasp on what New Zealand is like after following me the last few months, I apologize. You get what you pay for.

New Zealand and Canada are very similar. Both extraordinarily beautiful, well respected around the world, friendly people, good food, wine and a love for the outdoors. There is one cultural norm that stood out to me immediately that I find pretty innocent and fun. While this is more of a trend in the country and rural communities, you would also find it in cities.

Kids don't wear shoes. They own them, they just aren't overly keen on the idea. It is my understanding that most kids leave their homes with shoes but will ditch them on their walk to school or once at school. They will play outside without shoes. If you go to a store, you will see shoe-less kids inside. SHOE-LESS!! My dad would not be impressed. It has crossed my mind to take pictures of this phenomenon, but taking pictures of little kids you don't know is universally frowned upon. However, taking pictures of an old man taking money out of an ATM is widely praised.

I'm okay with kids doing it, I can see the appeal. Heyyyy no shoes!!! If you are an adult though, this is just reinforcing my last post about savagery. People here also love netball, sort of similar to basketball but only girls play. I'm a fan.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mrgmy9clLro

"You can do anything, but not everything"

David Allen

People are savages

This is a discovery I made while living with my cousin in Ottawa a few years ago.

People are savages.

While it is also true that people do extraordinary things every day, people can be incredibly generous and kind, that just isn't as fun as learning about our savagenaturous lifestyle...

Let's first define savage.

Oxford dictionary defines savage as a member of a people regarded as primitive and uncivilized.

One of my main thoughts (I don't have many) before writing this post was if you put 20 men and women together in the same place for a few hours to a few days from different countries who do not speak the same language, they will soon begin sleeping with each other.

If you put a group of people together for an extended period of time who can speak the same language, they will certainly hook up, fight and create drama. Think MTV's Real World and Big Brother.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0DapUtTDIk4

If a city is in the Stanley Cup final and ends up losing, rioting will ensue. Savages. 

If you leave people unattended, the amount of savagery could be unprecedented; food fights, debauchery,  etc..

Feral children who have literally been raised by wolves. Savages.
Although I don't blame them for their savageness, just happy they are alive. If you are interested, research feral children, really interesting and sad.

http://listverse.com/2008/03/07/10-modern-cases-of-feral-children/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sStqKtxI0IM

Coliseum gladiator fighting to the death? Savages.

Public hangings? Savages.

Getting caught for intercourse outside? Savages.

Ever been inside a public bathroom? Savages.

Rock stars trashing a hotel room? Savages.

Have you ever seen people eat ribs?

Savages are all around us people. While it might be part of our nature to act this way, let us all try and keep it together. We are trying to live in a society. 

"Laws are made not to be broken. They are made to curb our savagery." 

Toba Beta

I'm an idiot

I'm an idiot. I don't say this in a depressing, feeling sorry for myself way. It's just at times I make poor decisions. Falling through a roof, losing my passport, not having an plan for after university, etc. I'm okay with it. I still feel awesome most of the time. I now make better long term life choices and confident my life is heading in the right direction.

Which leads us to my most recent mini debacle. Working on the mountain and snowboarding are essentially the only two things to do here. Some would add drinking to the list but I'm not into that kind of stuff...Towards the end of the day on Sunday, I got a 20 minute break to go for a ride on an incredibly sunny day. Need to take a t-bar up this one part of the hill.

Small children ride these things effortlessly. My first attempt was a fail. Embarrassing but funny. Second attempt goes better up until about a quarter of the way to go, I bail. Again sort of funny. I begin my walk of shame to the top. Exhausting work, I take a break. To my right there is a slope that leads to the track I need to connect with. I'm a cautious guy and asses how risky going down this somewhat steep ridge is. Not keen on walking the rest of the way up, I decide my riding skills will safely get me down this slope. Strap up, stand up and start to descend.

Quickly realize why there aren't other tracks in this specific spot. Ice. Shortly after getting up, I quickly began sliding down head first with my boots strapped in heading face first into a decent sized rock. Luckily I was wearing the helmet I had just bought and managed to dodge the rock and hit it instead with my hip. I heard a crunch, tumbled maybe twenty more feet down the slope and stopped. That didn't feel great. Was down for a few minutes but slowly got better. My hip and wrist hurt but generally felt okay and glad I missed the rock. Took the chairlift back down. started seeing spots and thought I might pass out. Make it to the bottom, told to clock out and check in with the medical guys to make sure everything is good. Ask me a few questions, doctor looks at my bruises, left wrist is a bit swollen, can move it and doesn't hurt like when I fell through the roof. Take a quick x-ray, fracture point same as the last time but looks way worse than my last x-ray. I did it again. Cast on 4-6 weeks, no snowboarding.

Going to see a specialist tomorrow in Taupo. Apparently my elbow might not be exactly where it needs to be from my last fall so will get that checked out. Luckily I am able to continue working in an area that doesn't involve me having to pick anyone up or do heavy lifting. My hope is to be back riding at the start of September. Four weeks will fly by. I am just disappointed in myself for doing this again. I did not learn my lesson and I did not take care like I was told too.

A story from Stu

I lived in Abu Dhabi, UAE, for one year. I worked in the student support service department at an international school as an ESL/Reading Specialist. My partner Nicholas, and myself developed and operated our own program, which assisted students from non-English speaking countries develop their basic English skills. This included standardized testing and small group lessons focusing on each students individual goals. Despite the absence of managerial direction and times of complete confusion, the job was amazing and I had a lot of fun working with Nic and the students. Nothing is better than having the freedom and power to cancel an "important" grammar lesson, and focus on developing the student's vocabulary and conversation through the demonstration of magic tricks... Sorry, I mean illusions. I really did love that job. Also, I did love the downtown apartment down the street from the beach, two free flights, lots of vacation time, paid summer and bonuses, and the steady healthy paycheck. Why the hell did I leave?! Oh yeah, unfortunately, as much as I love teaching and working with students, teaching isn't a career choice for me...yet. Maybe one day, but not today. Plus, I didn't want to live in Abu Dhabi, and that's a whole other paragraph...Or more.

Lets start with "life in the Middle East". I don't think I have ever encountered a topic with so many opinions and misunderstandings, and so much confusion and just general ignorance. First, the Middle East is a huge mass of land within the Asian and African continents. It has around 17 countries within it. Each of these countries have their own array of cultures, foods, politics, languages, environments, religions, and laws. So, your friend who lives in Beirut has a much different view of the Middle East, than your friend who has a sister living in Saudi Arabia. This was a mistake I made early on. I was looking for Mediterranean Lebanese Middle East. Instead, I got desert gulf UAE Middle East. Lebanon and Israel, while not on the friendliest terms, are two of the biggest party destinations on Earth. Think, clubs, alcohol and drugs, beach parties, thongs, and lots of plastic surgery. Traditionally, the gulf region, which includes the UAE, Saudi Arabia, Oman, etc., is a more conservative region. Think, no alcohol, cover your daughters and wives, and "that woman better not be driving no car!". Prior to the oil boom, this was also a poorer region, with only pearls and date trees.

The UAE is a bit of an exception to this rule. The Emirates of Abu Dhabi and Dubai have decided to use their oil money to bring in hundreds of low paid labourers, build incredible skyscrapers and hotels, and develop their countries as tourist destinations. Well played UAE. But, remember, tourist love to go to bars and get really messed up, stare at beautiful scantly clad ladies, and then wind up going home with a prostitute. No fear, tourists and foreigners can drink to their hearts content, but only in a bar/club connected to a hotel and please don't pass out in the streets, or we're sending you to jail. And shit, we'll turn a blind eye to prostitution. Oh, and to sweeten the deal, all bars/clubs shall host a ladies night at least once a week, where all ladies shall drink as much as they can at no cost. Let the debauchery ensue! But you better not be rollin' up to no club without your designer boots and a fresh new Rolls Royce!! If drinking champagne and chilling in classy bars/clubs with beautiful ladies is your thing, Abu Dhabi can be a blast. A friend once told me, "there are beautiful women all over the world", maybe he was on to something.

With all of the money around, Abu Dhabi must be an expensive place to live?? Not really. Due to the lower class of labourers and secretaries, which make up a giant percentage of the population, food and drinks can be had for pretty cheap. It's important to keep the working class within reach of things that make them happy..... and living. Think $1 shawarma and $2 Indian talee. When in doubt, shoot for the big spinning stick of meat.
It's important to remember that native Emirates only make-up around 20% of the population in the UAE. And generally they don't want much to do with the other 80%, just as long as they keep the machine rolling. I knew a few women who dated Emirate men and I've met many Emirate men at bars, but that's usually the extent. I don't think I saw an Emirate citizen for the first 2 weeks in the UAE. The Emirates want to make their country rich and powerful, and maintain that wealth and power, everyone else is just swinging by to either spend some cash or make as much as they can and run. 

This national psyche transcends into everything and results in a strange emptiness to the cities. Make money, drink, party, sleep with a hooker, and then get the hell out! Don't get me wrong, this isn't necessarily a bad thing. It makes the UAE a very easy place to make some money, relax, and then leave when you're ready. There are some really great things about life in the UAE. I know people who have lived there for 20 years, and will continue to do so until they revoke his visa. Abu Dhabi is an easy city to get around in, food can be cheap, there is always events happening, the winter weather is amazing, the beaches are great, and the desert is unreal. I'll always remember camping in the desert with some of my best friends, climbing a sand dune in the middle of the night, and sitting at the top watching the stars stretch all the way down to the horizon with only sand dunes for miles. I also developed some of the greatest friendships of my life in Abu Dhabi. If I hadn't have got into grad school, I would have been back in the big sandbox making a little more cash and enjoying another year with some fine folks.
I hope this helps shed a little more light on my life in Abu Dhabi and the Middle East. It was a bit of a strange place, but so is any country. That's what travelling is all about. It wasn't a good or bad experience, it was just life.

“I was surprised, as always, by how easy the act of leaving was, and how good it felt. The world was suddenly rich with possibility.”

Jack Kerouac, On the Road

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jX9SgtRTgE

Editor's note: 

Stu and I met in Thailand. One night on an island, I got a tattoo of an anchor. After seeing mine, Stu then promptly followed with his own "manchor'. After this, a few other people in our town got anchors. Let's not forget who started the trend. Just saying. Thanks for the post Stu!

Intricacies between Western and Asian women

I know what you're thinking: "Bert, you don't know anything about girls, blah blah blah". I would say you are almost right. I've somehow managed to learn at least a few things about the fairer sex from two different regions and thought I would try and share what I may or may not know. This not only comes from first hand observations but those stories I hear from friends. Do not trust this information. The terms girls and women are used interchangeably throughout.

Let's start by saying that while cultures and customs make certain people act differently, girls/women are fundamentally the same all over the world. I tell myself this all the time, there are girls everywhere. Everywhere you go you will be able to find one, usually in packs. They all want to be treated with respect, be protected, have someone to love, laugh with, create memories together and share their day with.

From what I gather, women in the Western world are a bit more prone to hand holding, kissing etc earlier on and faster that Asian women (aka easier). I'm not really sure why and not true for everyone but I think is more accepted in the western media than it is if family/reputation centered Asia. I would guess the amount of guys women sleep with is higher in North America than in Asia.

Being super clingy and obsessive is a trait that is found in both cultures. It is a trait that is bit more frowned upon and discussed in the West. Girls know that guys don't like being texted/called all the time because they don't like it either. On the other hand, in Asia, it is seen as more acceptable to be a bit more involved early on, calling or texting all the time even if they don't know each other very well yet. I'm not sure if Asian guys act that way to other Asian or Western girls but it is certainly a theme I hear others talk about when dealing with cross cultural relationships. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=14ZO1b3T6jo

As a very general rule, I would say Western women are more independent and will stand up to a man more than in Asia. Western women aren't as worried about finding a new man in their life and have their friends to back them up and encouraging them to end things. Asian women might accept a slightly lower behaviour from their boyfriends and just not express it as vocally or straightforward than other women might. There are also women is Asia who will straight up bite you in a nightclub for no reason so you aren't ever entirely safe.

Another interesting difference I found is that Asian women tend to age a bit more gracefully but will also lie about their age by adding a year, not subtracting. This is a small sample size but something that is in strike contrast to the Western world.

Finally, and this is purely my own experience, I feel like I trusted women in Asia more and thought they were less likely to cheat. While you have to be careful that some might date you because you are white, I just felt like I never had anything to worry about. Just my opinion.

The more I thought about it, the more similar both types of women are. Women love to gossip about other guys, like to buy new dresses and go out dancing, want a family at some point in the future and want a reliable, good hearted man beside them. They both can get jealous, be incredibly generous and funny. I think that dating and love are hard enough as it is without adding a communication barrier, differing attitudes towards money and cultural/family differences. I think that dating people from another culture or country is something to be encouraged and embraced. You will learn about another way of life and maybe view certain things from a different perspective.

Finally, I think we get too involved in the thinking about the future (I am incredibly guilty in this respect) and not focusing on what make us happy right now. Things might not workout with this person 9 months from now but it might make you a whole lot happier in the next 3 weeks. While we should keep an eye onto the future, let's not delay our happiness to a nondescript future date that may not ever arrive.

"Feel more, think less" Kaitlyin Poisson