Monday, October 8, 2012
Appreciate the love
I read this article and I suggest you read if you have time: http://www.wanderingearl.com/everybody-told-me-i-was-a-useless-bum/ Wanted to share my experience. If you don't want or have time to read it, summary is a bunch of his readers have messaged him lately about people in their lives not being fully supportive about their decision to leave home, travel/work abroad for whatever period of time. He agrees and has had the same experiences of people telling him he is making a mistake, is wasting his life, not living in reality and needs to get a "real job". The fact that some people are like this doesn't surprise me, haters gonna hate, but it surprises me that so many people are having these challenges with their friends and family.
First reason: I have not experienced this. Maybe that is because people just think it and would rather not tell me that what I'm doing isn't the best idea. Out of all of the people I have told and have found out about what my plans are, I have only had two instances of not 9838333% love and weren't even unsupportive. The second person I told was more just shocked and thought I was kidding. Not sure if he thought it was a bad idea, just something he wouldn't do. The other slight and in retrospect legitimate was concern from my older and wiser brother. In fairness, he has more reason to worry than anyone else. He knows I'm a monkey, is worried I will fall into a sewer and start looking for ninja turtles or he will be called at 2:30am asking him to bail me out of a Bangkok prison while taking 500 000 baht from his account.
As a side note Alain was the last person I told, maybe 4-5 days after I booked the one-way because I knew what he might think and only told my mom a day or two before him because I was somewhat afraid, didn't want to make her sad that her favorite son was leaving her and wanted to tell her in person.
Second reason: The people you tell are or should be the people that want the complete best for you. If someone is making a huge life decision, has put a ton of thought into it, has a plan and is genuinely excited about it, why would you try and bring them down? You think this will make your life better? Go for it and tell me all about it. I understand people have concerns about their safety,money, falling behind with their peers but friends and family should do their best to be happy for them, try and help them anyway they can, and give them all of your support.
This is sort of like a friend saying to me "Bert! I'm getting married this fall and planning on having a baby next year!!" Me: "Hmmmmm I don't know about all this. You should probably wait and think this through. Even though this is your life and you live it everyday, I know what's best for my friends" Are you kidding? Be a good friend, voice slight concerns in a very supportive way and let people live the life they choose.
Don't have to tell any of you this because I have been shown nothing but love, support and interest. Just surprised about other peoples tales. Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving, now only 77 days till Christmas!!
"If you want to support others you have to stay upright yourself" Peter Hoeg